People are always going to have something more than you. Money, popularity, looks and what not! The urge of envy is natural, and social media and all the other information feeds in your life benefit from it. But you can always ask yourself, is my worth measured based on the number of likes and followers I have? Not at all.
When you see a person, who enjoys thousands of followers, travels the world and finds interesting things to work on, you feel like life is not worth it. You feel like there must be something more in life. How can they have everything and I have so little? But if you consider their lives, the lives of people you think are so good and fortunate, you realize that what they have on their Facebook wall is a lot different from their emotional state in reality.
We Want to Fit In
This problem is not about comparison or the trap. The problem is predefined programming of our minds that tell us to constantly compare ourselves to people around us. We are social species. We need to fit in. We need to become more like the people we live around. If everyone is going skydiving, you will want to do it too. If everyone is buying a new car in your neighborhood, you will want to do it too.
Eventually, it creates a lacking mentality. You are constantly aware of what you don’t have. You feel miserable and dissatisfied with everyone and everything in life. This little problem eventually turns into depression. Imagine lifeless faces aimlessly browsing through their Facebook feeds. Liking aimlessly on posts made by the hundreds of people they follow.
Everything Is Not What It Seems
The feeling of lacking is not just a comparison trap, but also a starting point of depression, anxiety, unhappiness, loneliness, anger and many other psychological problems.
To avoid that, here are a few things you can do to keep your mind sane and beat the comparison blues.
1. Understand Social Publications – All social media and all the news you receive about people, including the updates in their lives have had a starting point. Someone deliberately put that post or piece of information up there for you to see and appreciate. And just because they put the information doesn’t mean they are living that life. It could be a brief moment. It’s not their complete life. It is completely possible that you are living your life to the fullest and they’re only experiencing moments of clarity which is making them publish their experiences on the web. Whatever the case is though, there is no reason for you to become apathetic towards your own life. Keep telling yourself, “Everything is going just great!” and smile.
2. Treat yourself with respect – Social media often makes you believe you are not living a perfect life. It distracts you from your goal. Overdosing information about people who tell you they are successful can be harmful to your career and even your family life. What they tell you may be completely different from what actually is. You’re just made to believe. You are perfect the way you are. Your life doesn’t need a comparison factor to be good enough. Treat yourself with respect.
But sometimes, you are so addicted to it, you can’t get your mind off of it. This is where the Nitaai Breathing exercise comes in. It is a master-key to understanding yourself. It clears your mind off everything that’s disturbing you. Once your conscience clears up, you will become mindful and motivated, you will become peaceful and calm. You will understand the reality easily. You will feel better about yourself because you won’t be worried about comparison traps. You will be truly free.